Thursday, December 2, 2010

Writing: Eliminating Doubt #reverb10

I started this blog in 2008 on a cold rainy night to avoid grad school on a whim.   In 2009 I wrote because I needed to, and I learned that writing honestly about pain is the quickest way to get through it.  There was a lot of pain in 2009.  It was 2010, however, when I really started feeling like a writer.  The need to write was there now, but WHAT to write about?  I started spending time dedicated to writing.  I hid in coffee shops more, I wrote a lot.  It felt good.  Better than good, it was elating.

Despite the strides I've made in writing this year, there is still one thing I do every day that needs to GTFO (get the eff out); doubt.

How many times do I edit myself?  Delete posts?  Decide that no one will like it, or think no one will find it funny/interesting/touching.  Delete.  Delete.  Save to Draft.  Edit.  Edit. Delete. 

This year, more of my friends and real-life community know about and read my blog.  Which is different.. if only because I don't get to write about crushes as easily because HE MIGHT BE READING THIS RIGHT NOW (Hi, i think you're really cute) (Call me). 

Yesterday I was really proud of what I wrote, something that has been happening more and more but I was debating whether or not to post the link to my Facebook page.  The one thing keeping me from doing it was doubt.  What would everyone think?  Would they roll their eyes that I have a blog?  Would that think my writing is crap?  Would the send flying monkeys to throw pie in my face?  Maybe.  Probably.

Then I talked to Chelsea and she had this advice:

ALWAYS POST :)
  be proud of your writing, your words, even if you're afraid of what people would think
  stand by 'em- people will love you more for it.

So I did.  I stopped doubting myself, posted it, and felt a little braver.  It was freeing.  Totally worth the potential pie in the face from the monkeys. 

Doubt can suck it and is being eliminated as of today.  You've been warned.
at 12/02/2010
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22 comments:

  1. I'm intensely passionate about authenticity. I think if more of us told 'doubt' about our sharing to GTFO (or to GDIAF*, as I like to say), we'd all feel a whole lot more connected. We are all fabulous. We all suck. We all have wonderful days and craptacular days. Being honest, writing honestly, is incredibly healing, both for the writer and for the reader.

    I'm so glad I found you through reverb. :)

    *go die in a fire. Yes, I play World of Warcraft as does every member of my family. *rolmao*

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  2. Yes, always always post. I agree with Chelsea's advice. I've been blogging for close to 7 years and the more I let writing go, the more I learned about myself.

    As long as you stand behind your words and yourself, people in your life will appreciate your bravery and honesty.

    - Berrak

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  3. No pies in your face. Stay brave.

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  4. Great post! I struggle with this too. My blog is geared towards my professional life so I away struggle with what type of information to post and how much to share as I know my family and colleagues read it. Reverb10 is helping me to stretch these limits and I felt brave posting my first response yesterday.

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  5. Ahhh, thank you hunny for the shout out- proud of you for posting. You're the shiz. Great post dear!

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  6. I could use alot less doubt in my life as well - thank you for the inspiration!

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  7. Doubt is the number one blocker for my writing. I can't tell you how many times I've written a post only to doubt that anyone else will like it and in turn stop liking it. Even if it's a good post, something that i need to get out.

    Here's to no more doubt!!

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  8. I found this post from the reverb hashtag on delicious, and I'm so glad that I did. I just wrote about doubt and writing too, and I'm glad someone else has some opinion and advice on the same topic.

    I teach composition at a university and my students struggle with self-doubt all the time, but I realized I still do when I also won't post a link to my blog on my facebook profile. I took you're lead and that ends today. I hope we can keep this up!

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  9. I wrote something very similar! Glad to see I'm not the only one with this hang-up.

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  10. you have no idea how much i need to hear this. i have a blog i keep secret for all of the things i'm afraid the world will react to - every time i write one of them i think "which blog should this go to...how brave should i be..."

    thank you for being inspiring.

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  11. Purging doubt is hard but so freeing. Good for you!

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  12. Fuck doubt. Let's live life boldly. Play like a champion. No exceptions. Love you.

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  13. Ahhh, great post. I especially like this:

    "In 2009 I wrote because I needed to, and I learned that writing honestly about pain is the quickest way to get through it."

    I abandoned my blog for a while after hard times hit in 2010, and I'm realizing now how important it really is for me to just get it all out.

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  15. I had the same fear of posting links to Facebook especially. I told people I blogged but rarely shared the link.

    Until finally, a few months ago, I took the plunge and began posting every post's link to FB. And I've gotten some incredible feedback! I'm so glad I started doing it.

    If our friends can't give us the first line of support/constructive criticism we want and need, who can?

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  16. Oh my, you know, I haven't posted my blog link to my Facebook page for that exact reason.

    Good for you that you found the courage!

    P.S. Have fun meeting up with Tabitha tomorrow night (came here through her blog, btw.) I wanted to join you, but it was a bit short-notice this time. Maybe some other time.

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  17. Yes! Stay brave! I recognize this as one of my obstacles to writing as well. Seeing other people maintain their boldness and post what is on their mind inspires me to keep doing the same. Thank you!

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  19. I want your flying monkeys. Mine just throw poop.

    P.S. I think "I want your flying monkeys" should be tested as a pick-up line.

    P.P.S. LOVE.

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  20. Self-doubt is just a sign that you're a writer. Any writer who says they never doubt their ability is a liar. One summer I came home and my mom (who always listens to my self-doubt manifestos of pity) had painted on my wall "I am a writer, I am a writer, I am a writer." And so, "You are a writer! You are a writer! You are a damn good writer!"

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  21. So... did he call?!

    I couldn't agree more. The whole "who do I tell I have a blog" thing is exhausting. In the end, I put my link on my FB page but only promote it on Twitter. That said, lots of people have found the link on their own and are really nice about it. I'm sure, there are just as many people who read it and laugh.

    ... they're probably the same people whose blogs I would laugh at, so I call it a draw.

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  22. I support the elimination of your EVER doubting yourself again, because HI. You are amazing. :)

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